Experiment

I think I'm going to slowly start blogging for shits and giggles to see if the universe notices. If not it makes a good place to dump my brains... which right now are full of mucus

It never ends

What the fashion-conscious Sens fan is wearing this Fall

Well after downing the Leaf's for the second time in a row the Senators look to be off to a great start this season. If you include the pre-season that's 9 and 0. On the downside it looks like with the complete disintegration of the Sabres as a contender the Senators are going to have all the pressure back on their shoulders again. All the same this looks like it could be a great year for Sens fans everywhere. And hey the Sens have these awesome new threads that we can drop 140 bucks on! Sweet!

Donations are accepted and welcome!

One last good spin around the sun

When I was turning 19 people told me to enjoy it because at 25 your metabolism will start to slow down, and you won’t have the energy you once had. For me that turned out to be complete garbage, when I was 25 I’d gotten down to a fighting weight of 155 Lbs and was in much better shape than I’d ever been. I was rollerblading 4 times a week, and overall I felt young. Now that I’m 29 I can’t help but feel a sense of dread at this last year in my twenties. It’s like watching the first leaf fall from a tree in September knowing exactly what’s to come. I’ve rollerbladed this summer about as many times as I’ve golfed. Summer evenings spent tearing up the rails and ledges of Waterloo have become evenings of working on my degree and renovating our house. I’m a little softer in the mid section, a little mellower in the temper and all around just older.

It’s interesting that they say you’re only as old as you feel. It gives you the belief that by trying to be energetic and healthy you’ll somehow avoid getting older. Unfortunately it doesn’t work that way. You can throw on the baggy jeans, play the music too loud and go out on the weekends and drink your face off but that little voice in the back of your head when you were 19 is now the booming loudspeaker of adulthood.
I’ve often felt immature for my age but I think deep down I’ve always put on the front of immaturity with the knowledge that very soon I’d have to put away my toys and be a big boy. Where did the time go? I wanted to go rollerblading this weekend but looks like renovation-mania will continue.

…besides I get sore knees and my back just kills me, someone get me my walker

Handy man beotch

Wow what a busy week. The wife and I have been doing some painting and touch ups around the house this week. Part of that has been me taking care of outstanding electrical and mechanical repairs. Let me tell you if your garage door opener stops working some day get a new house. Sure it's probably not feasible to just drop a real estate for sale sign on the lawn but you'd probably prefer it. If you don't do that just buy a new one and get someone else to install it.

I did figure out how to fix it but it took a while and I was up to my elbow in black grease also and the first time I ran the door the encoder wasn't in place and the opener almost snapped the rail. With that under my belt I also replaced all the switches and outlets in the kitchen and replaced a faulty lamp socket. When it was all said and done... work sucks.

But at least I'm not Canada's worse handyman.

Look who got gussied up!

Well I was enjoying a little down time on the holiday Monday whilst the wife and extended family visited St. Jacobs so I figured I'd give my weapon of mass destruction a cleaning. My paintball gun is one of my prize posessions. Purchased at a steal of a hundred bucks I always enjoy anihilating kids with their thousand dollar guns (gifts from Mommy) with it. I hadn't cleaned it since my last outing so I figured I'd strip it down and clean it up. Don't know if I've ever posted a pic of it before so here she is :)



I've also been watching the Sopranos Season 2 all weekend so I loaded my paintball gun up with ball bearings and shot the old bitch next door.

She had it coming

You are feeling very sleepy

Taking the GT-R badge off my Tiburon was probably the most major "Upgrade" it'll ever receive. That's unfortunate but that's the lot in life for a "responsible adult." All the same I find it fun to see what other people are doing to their Tiburons. Some time's it's horrid, other times it's a-very cool. One example is the Chadoffl's Tiburon featured on Next Generation Motorsports. NGM makes tuner parts for the Tiburon that can turn the pretty "chick car" into a monster. Chadoff's car (pictured here) to me is a perfect example of tuning done right. Under the hood there's a 379HP Super-charged version of the stock 2.7Litre V6 engine. On the exterior there isn't a damn difference between it and a stock Tiburon. Therein lies the beauty this thing is the ultimate sleeper car. If you're out for a grocery run the man won't pay any attention to your "stock" commuter car, however when that punk in the Civic tries to pass you on the right you can leave him in a bewildered state of disbelief.

For constrast, here's a Tiburon done wrong

Man overboard!

Since LosRicos has stepped away from his blog I fear he won't have the opportunity to post this most excellent update so I figured I'd do him the honor.

Pretty much every year the wife and I go canoeing on the grand river it's one of those summer outings we always seem to enjoy. Last year we didn't get to go out due to all the getting married madness so we were happy to get back to the river again. The grand river definitely isn't white water rafting with no noticeable current and an average depth of about 2 feet it's a pretty beginner friendly river. All the same other than the wife and I no one else we went with (3 couples) had much experience canoeing.

After helping the other couples launch the canoes the wife and I quickly caught up with the pack. Approximately 100' from the starting point we hit our first shallow part. Usually the best way to deal with those is to paddle hard and drive straight forward (insert sexual innuendo here.) Well TheRich and Sunflower, being first timers, hadn't experienced cresting the shallows and were caught unawares when they hit the gravel. Unfortunately the weight differential between the two didn't provide the most stability and after an initial wobble they pitched over and ended up in the drink.

It was funny because Rich even mentioned before they set out that they were going to capsize. It's actually the first time I've ever seen it. Either way since it was only about 2-3 feet deep there was no immediate danger. After that (other than one more close call) TheRich and Sunflower kept the pace and avoided any more underwater exploration. The day was fun for sure, we'll have to do it again next year.

By the way if you ever want to know what kind of houses the richest people in KW have just canoe down the grand and look to your left... un-freaking-believable

Maxim hates you! (and me)

Strangely enough I actually ordered a Maxim subscription for my wife for Christmas which might seem like one of the worse gift ideas ever but she actually finds mens magazines entertaining. As a bonus I can read them when she's done and they are usually a good throne-read.

I just finished reading an article about bloggers and vloggers. Apparently Maxim wants us to knock it off. I think "Mouth-breather" and "Basement Dweller" are thrown around in there too. I can definitely see their point about "illaterate teenz wit know concep of gramer" but they do seem to go on quite a tirade. It definitely paints bloggers with pretty broad brush strokes as a uniform, teeming mass of self-important glory hounds.

Personally I'd argue "If you don't like it fuck off." Really if you want to go out there and find the bleating melodramatic douche bags you can easily find them. Either way I think I'll keep blogging on the off chance someone randomly stumbles on my blog and thinks something I say is remotely interesting... or tells me I suck and should die... that's cool too.

Maxim also printed a rollerblader joke so that really got my ire up

Man down!

So unbeknownst to me, in my current haze of work, study and occasional forays into the land of Tamriel we lost one of our bloggers! LosRicos has walked away from his Blogger account with a last word of "Fin". Classy, and succinct but somewhat upsetting. Los Ricos, has been blogging since before I knew what the heck a blog even was. TheRoss and Daejin were assuming I was going that way too because my posts of slowed to virtual standstill. Well don't fear my readers (i.e no one) I'll keep writing inane drivel that you won't see at a more frequent rate than you've seen lately! Once a month! Honest :)

In a side note... I kind of want a job as a Corporate Ninja. My job has been just stupid busy of late and a coworker and I were talking and we thought Corporate Ninja would be much more fun. Jumping out of the rafters and attacking the projector during particularly boring powerpoints would be a good example of a necessary job function. Beats sales anyday!

Office Linebacker would be a good fallback

Golfing ain't good, but it ain't work

When I play golf with customers and co-workers I almost feel more like an undercover agent than a player. Sure I'll speak of "Dog Legs" and "Pitching Wedges" but I'm just not "Feeling it" like the others. I mentioned a while back I got my clubs for free, so I've used them twice! Fortunately, despite the assurances otherwise, I haven't become hopelessly addicted to the game.

There's a nice side effect to not caring though; golf is fucking hard! I never said it was easy before and had no delusions of grandeur in my head, even still I was astonished at how difficult the game is. All the same apparently I'm not horrible which is more than I could have ever hoped for. Today I scored 115 on a particularly brutal 18 hole course called "Crosswinds."

The weird thing is people that had a 5 stroke lead one me (:phht:) felt the need to tell me to watch my follow through, straighten my arm, bend my wrist, do the hokey pokey... etc... Just piss off Tiger, I'm doing okay. Although I don't think the grounds-keeper appreciated me unsodding his fairway or having a beach party in his bunkers.

I showed my appreciation by constantly locking up the brakes on our golf cart... fucker

A familiar (painful) SENSation

In the lotteries for happiness you have available to you rooting for a sports team isn’t an intelligent bet. In the NHL there is a 1/30 chance that your team is going to come out on top. Of course it isn’t quite a roll of the dice, some teams have overcome mere odds to be dominating forces. The Devils, Avalanche and Red Wings pretty much owned the 90s and turn of the century, the Oilers and Islanders had their chunk of the 80s, then before that Montreal owned just about everybody. Since their debut in the 92-93 season the modern incarnation of the Senators have had a pretty great record as a team. Sure they were last place in the NHL for 4 seasons running… but after that they’ve made the playoffs 10 times consecutively and have captured the presidents trophy and top place in their division numerous times. I probably didn’t “really” start becoming a Senators fan until 2000. When I was living in Newfoundland I actually was a fan of the New Jersey Devils. I used to play as them in NHLPA 93 for the Super Nintendo and oddly enough grew fond of the team. It was exciting watching them in the playoffs both as the bridesmaid to New York’s Cup and the big winner after that. Once I moved to Ontario I finally felt a connection of having a “Local Team” and of course that was Ottawa because Toronto isn’t a hockey team it’s an investment strategy. Since then there have been lots of highs during the regular season, especially devastating the Maple Leafs game after game, but the lows always came in the Playoffs, especially getting dumped by the underskilled Maple Leafs 4 times. Over the past 10 years we’ve developed the reputation as the “Choke Team”, all the talent all the momentum but no delivery in the playoffs.

This year it really felt different, from Game 1 against Pittsburgh the Senators have looked poised, determined and damn near unstoppable against 3 (debatably) “better” teams. We even demolished the #1 ranked Buffalo Sabres in 5 games. Now unfortunately the tides have turned for the worse. 2 Games in to the Stanley Cup Finals the Senators have yet to show up to play. The fire and ferocity that we’ve seen up to this point has seemed to have been snuffed by the suffocating defense of this Anaheim team. Saturday night’s game will undoubtedly be huge, it is realistically a “Must Win” although the same was probably true of last night’s game. Perhaps Ottawa can find a way to turn around and take it to the Ducks, but I am not blind to the fact that there is a possibility that Anaheim is simply the better team.

I really hope Ottawa can complete the Cinderella story. I want to see guys like Fisher, Neil and Corvo hoisting the cup. I want a Ottawa Senators 2007 Stanley Cup Champions hat. I want to be able to laugh at all the Leafs fans and say “Who’s choking now?” However, I think in the end I’m going to end up reflecting on another season of almost. That said I think the Senators really showed a lot of character this year regardless of the outcome and I am very proud of their accomplishments. If the cup isn’t to be this year, then I’ll hold on for another year when maybe it will happen. Thus is the cross we bare as fans. Good or bad they’re you’re team…. Until the Hamilton Predators start playing.

I wonder how many Senators flags we’ll see disappearing from cars next week?

Aurevoir... fuckers

Wow! Paris was quite the experience. Let me say in summary the trip was awesome, the Eiffel Tower at night, viewing works of art like the Mona Lisa and the Venus de Milo at the Louvre, the Architecture, the pastries . That said... people in Paris fucking suck! Fuck! I mean seriously you go in with a certain amount of forewarning about the Parisian attitude but seriously it was unreal. I actually like French, I even like speaking it whenever I get the chance but visiting Paris makes me want to format the part of my brain that learned French and put German there instead.

I realize my French is sketchy but if I say "Quatre" and you repeat "Deux?" back to me you're just trying to piss me off. Most cultures take it as a compliment if you try to speak their language, sure you sound like a retard but at least you're making an effort. French people clearly don't look at it this way, it's almost as though your mispronunciation is an insult to them. So fine your French sucks, lets just speak English... ya that doesn't work either basically you speak perfect French or you fuck off and die toute de suite!

I actually started to get pretty discouraged after about a day and really only my loving wife's reassurance convinced me to keep trying to talk with the people there. There was one guy who spoke to me entirely in French and didn't seem frustrated at my limited vocabulary and horrible accent. However, he was the dood working at the sandwich shop down the street from our hotel and he was actually Greek if I'm not mistaken. Either way he said my French was "Pretty Good" which was a nice change of pace. After that though it was just asshole after asshole.

After a week I was quite happy to go back to Canada. Oh and by the way French Food? Highly overrated!

In conclusion I'd say Paris was my favourite place to visit in the world...

After Edinburgh, Montreal, London, Cleveland, Shanghai, Hong Kong, Toronto, Phoenix, Baltimore and St. Louis (perhaps tied with Barrie)

Bonjour Paris!

If you'd like some comic relief for the day take the following post and churn it through the French > English Translator over at Altavista. I'm sure it'll be amusing if not comprehensible.

Aujourd'hui, ma marieé et moi ont voyages a France pour notre vacances. Quand J'etais jeune j'ai aimé essayer parler Francais. Les autres etudients n'aime pas Francais. Je toujours essais practiquer ma Francais, quand les autres ne veut pas. Quand j'etais en College j'ai pris une cours de "Francais Conversationnelle" parce que je veut souviens comment dire Francais. J'ai essai n'oublie pas le chose que j'ai apris mais je pense ma Francais maintenant est horrible. J'espere que le gens en Paris est plus gentil que les histoires, mais je pense il irais faut que je demande, "Parle-tu l'anglais monsieur?"

Je suis desolé

We don't talk like we used to

Wow sorry blog it’s been a while. We don’t talk quite as much as we used to huh? This weekend TheWife and I were talking and we discussed how much time we spend on our computers watching tv/surfing the weeb/playing video games and we realized it’s way too much time. At least the Wife is using her time on her rather successful blog instead of just wasting time. Me I’m mostly wasting my time on the computer. I decided for this week I’m going to use my time more effectively. That includes doing some yardwork, running errands, doing laundry, playing guitar, working on my French, and in general just avoiding sitting on my duff doing nothing.

However, you’ll have to note that when the hockey game is on all bets are off! And I’ll be sitting with my duff planted firmly on the couch yelling at referees and cheering for goals. Definitely noticing a lot more Senator's flags around these days. *cough* Bandwagon *cough*. By the way, who are these guys and what did they do with our Senators?

Whoever they are I think I like them a lot better.

Reality Shows

Well I got to admit it, when the wife first started watching Dancing with the Stars I was not particularly impressed. It became "Go study" time for me when I'd retreat to the kitchen to work on my university course. Silly me I should have learned to keep my distance. All of a sudden I'm dazzled with Apollo Ono's footwork and I find Ian's stance rigid and lacking in fluidity. The fact that they paired up Laila Ali with a guy still surprises me a little because if you hear her talk it's obvious she's actually a man.

While I'll admit a weakness for dancing wash-ups, I definitely have a resistance to all other forms of Reality crap. I took a glance at the new bachelor tonight. Whoa! They really must've emptied the supply of willing (albeit mentally defective) hotties in favour of some pug fuglies. I mentioned to my wife they could really spice up the Bachelor if they upped the ante a little. I suggested roses for the winners and a dagger for the women that don't quite measure up. Sure it'd be brutal... but it'd be interesting telly!

Susan, we had a really nice time and it was nice to meet your family but *STAB* *GURGLE*

Wow when Italian Leather just isn't good enough

My wife is definitely the fashionista in my house however I do lend my opinion on some of the stuff she looks at. This one was just too tempting. I was pointing out how some shoes are just crazy expensive even when they're on sale. I liked this shoe and started to rant on the price until I bust out laughing.

I don't know at what point it became legal, but I'm pretty sure making shoes from people breaks some kind of laws.

I could rant and rave about my battle with Hyundai but that's not over yet and I don't have anything happy to report.

Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you cry alone.

Remember that other week from hell?

This is its big brother.

I haven't be posting lately because I've been waiting for the sun's rays to break through my gray skies. Well... that ain't fucking happening so here's my bitch post.

Last Thursday night instead of hanging with the homies watching the Senz stomp Crosby I was stranded at a highway McDonalds because my 4000KM old Tiburon died at the age of 5 weeks. Unbelievable! However, thankfully I still have a warranty. Turns out the clutch and the flywheel are both completely toast and guess what? They're not covered by warranty! Regardless at this early an age naturally the dealership that sold it to me will help me out. NOTHING! ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. They all but flipped me the bird! By the way Kingscross Motor Sports is the most corrupt organization of thieves known to man and I hope Anthony Chung mistakes tic tacs for his heart pills.

This weekend the wife and I went to pick up a "prize" we won (we thought at a wedding show) in Mississauga (1 hour drive.) Turns out it was one of those sales promotion blitzes where stupid people get hosed out of their money. Surly sales people like myself apparently get marched out the back door to an empty parking lot.

Then just today on my way to pick up my lovely wife from her workplace (since we have only one car) I forgot the turn to her workplace and in a bone head move decided to try to get over to the right lane in time and clipped a Chrysler 300. Undoubtedly he's going to send me some bogus 1000 dollar bill fore his "repairs" (it's a scuff mark.)

So far this week I'm looking to be down anywhere from 2-3000 dollars and it's only Tuesday.

Alcoholics aren't born, they're made during weeks like this

So you Pens fans were sayin'?

Don't worry I'm not going to start boasting or making any Jinxing statements about tomorrow night's game. I just thought I'd like to remind Penguins players that the Senators... they're not afraid of you. Not only do you have to contend with Alfredsson growing a pair of testicles you've also got to deal with players just stepping up their games. Corvo and Neil both come to mind. Corvo already has a pair of goals and Neil scored a beauty on the break away in the first game. Everyone on Ottawa is showing up for their games, and in Game 3 when we weren't so stellar, Rayzor came through with the big stops. The series ain't over yet, but if the Penguins want to stay alive they're going to have to contend with a Sens squad that's firing on all cylinders.

See you Ottawa tomorrow Crosby, get a good rest. You'll need it.

Cardiomygod

Man! Once again to anyone who attributes my not-being-fatness to “genes” or “metabolism” need only take a quick peek at my schedule this week to realize otherwise. Tonight I’m going to be hitting the gym for the first time in a while (given a mass build-up of guilt) due to illness over the last couple of weeks. I’ll probably do about 45 minutes of weights and 45 minutes of cardio on the Elliptical. So that’s day 1, I’ll probably do chest/shoulders/tri’s as legs will not be an option. Tomorrow at lunch I’ll be playing hockey for 1.5 hours with my boss and co-workers. Wednesday I will likely hit the gym again at lunch for back/bi’s. Thursday is 1.5 hours of hockey at lunch and another hour in the evening. Then on Friday another one hour game after work.

Putting in about 5 hours of hockey this week should be good given my recent drop-off in offense presence. 1 goal over the past 2 months of hockey is pretty pathetic since I play wing. I’m hoping I’ll get at least one goal this week at least. I’ve been missing a lot of shots by not only shooting them over the net but over the boards. I’m cutting down my Sherwood hockey stick because I’ve noticed it’s longer than my other sticks. So right now I’m blaming that for my recent scoring draught.

It’s easier than blaming it on my complete lack of skill.

Aye aye Captain!

Wow. So who is this crazy Swede?

For years now I've been a huge Alfredsson critic. The fact of the matter is I have on many an occasion said, "Trade his ass!" Personally I feel I've been justified, last year Alfredsson's playoff tally was 1 goal and 3 assists in 10 playoff games. Come on! You're the fricken Captain! Well that's what I've always said...

Now I'm changing my tune like a fan-boy bandwagon jumper. The thing is I knew Alfredsson was capable of more, and now he's showing it. About freakin' time for sure but hey, better late than never. Personally I thought Alfredsson absolutely demolishing Roberts with a bodycheck was a symbolism that transcended the scoreboard. Series is going well... who knows how it'll end, but if this keeps up it'll be all over.

Alfredsson riding that little bitch Armstrong was also a beautiful scene